The four color pen

You were not cool in grade school unless you had a Bic 4 color pen. I just saw one tonight for the first time in about 15 years. My marble compositon book would have a page in blue, a page in green, red underlines... They were the coolest thing since the erasable pen. Ah yes the grade school days..it may be story time again kids. It was 1987. Seventh grade. I was an altar boy for two years by this point and always wanted to serve weddings and funerals. You got tipped for these affairs. So the normal procedure would be to go into Church and prepare the altar area for the funeral and also to light the charcoal brickette that was used in the incense urn. You had to light it about 30 minutes prior to mass so it was good and hot when the incense was poured on it by the priest when he blessed the coffin. So Jim and I were getting our act together and got to the charcoal lighting part. We tried to get one started and it just seemed to be damp and wouldn't catch for us. So we tried another. Same thing. It finally worked on the third one. We disposed the other two in the trash. We then went over to the other side of the to get our altar boy gear on. When we came back....the trash was smoldering. Panic was about to set in, because there was no sink in the sacristy. Wine was the only liquid...and at that age we thought the alcohol would inflame the smoldering can more. The Church sat on top of the school, so it was on the second floor. The bottom of the steps was the principal's office. So that was not a viable escpae route with a smoldering can. So we remembered we were guys...and that we had built in fire extinguishers. So yes folks..me and Jim urinated in the can to put out the fire in Church. Luckily it was not that big and we had enough 'liquid' to stop the smoldering. I guess when I ask 'Why me God?', God may not have gotten over our urination in the Church sacristy. We were pretty proud of ourselves, so had a celebratory chug of the altar wine.